My Voice

Luke 5:1-11

And when they had brought their boats to land, they left everything and followed Him.

We sit together in the boat in the middle of the lake. Throughout the day, I observed how I constantly strive to achieve some form of stability in everything. And I share with Him all that is on my heart:

— Any stability is an illusion. The world is in motion. Every year spring comes, but each spring is unique.

What am I seeking in stability? Is it not death?

I seek control in it. Because I lack faith and humility. Humility that I do not know what will happen tomorrow or in the next minute. But I do not need to know. You are always watching over me, helping me, leading me by the hand.

Thy will be done!

I will find inner balance and peace only by accepting that both I and the world around me will always change.

The only point of stability available to me is You.

I accept this world in all its movement, diversity, and changeability. I accept that my nature is the same.

Peace in transformation is my Destiny.

If I desire something unchanging, it is Your love for me, Your faith in me, and Your support that are unchanging.

I saw how the fishermen followed You. I will follow You too.

***

Suddenly, we find ourselves on the shore, in the desert. A fabulously beautiful sunset is setting. Jesus is joyful, He laughs. He laughs! Around His incredible eyes, there are kind rays of wrinkles. He runs across the sand, grabs my hands, and draws me along. Spreading His arms, He shouts at the top of His voice, inviting me to do the same. It is so strange, so wild, I almost do not believe in all this, but I shout too. And with this shout, the pain of all that is unspoken, suppressed, locked, and eternally stuck in my throat comes out.

In my heart, His words resonate and resonate for a long time, I repeat them with trembling and hope:

Your voice is given to you to catch people.